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Dumpsters Part Troix FC |
2-12 |
Digital Rinse |
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Felix 'Pussy' Baker 2 |
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Once again Sunday evening looms and the Dumpster members were all
dropping like flies with a whole range of excuses – Onions was on his usual road trips up the M1, Ferret was camping
with Mrs Ferret, Fraggle was AWOL in Leicester doing god-know-what and
Spal threw in the towel late doors with the lamest
of excuses (getting a free lift home with Jim). Dick of the day was almost certainly decided, and the Dumpsters were left
down to five members, so Subbing Well wasn’t an option. With the ‘2 at the back’ team formation ready - Pussy ‘Reciting
Sonnets’ Baker, Allergies ‘Still feeling rough’ Dibble and School Night ‘My Ankle Really Hurts’ Dunn, we were ready to
take an absolutely pounding.
With 5 minutes to kick off – things were looking bad with Del ‘The Length’ Clifton and
Sykes running late, but with Lengths foresight to get changed on the train he arrived just in time. As for Sykes – he was
still battling with so-called delayed trains. Just as the Dumpsters were about to kick off with a man down, Sam from Team
Starbucks offers to help us out. Hurrah
First Half
Once again the Dumpsters went down 1-0 very quickly, and with a volley of shots all following that one into the back of
the net, the Dumpsters were down 5-0. SchoolNight ‘SubWell’ Dunn was having an absolute nightmare, but then Pussy ‘Reciting Sonnets’
Baker scored an absolute rasper, leaving the show-stopping keeper of the opposition only able to push the ball further into his own net,
5-1. Apart from the heavy tackles flying in from Starbucks Sam and good ball control from Pussy, Allergies and Length, Little else can be
said, as we could never get anywhere near the ball!!!! With the skills and flare of Rinse including the Watford lad (this time adopting
boots as opposed to the sandals he fashioned last season) they were even more deadly and they scored yet again. Half Time score 6-1. Gutting!
Second Half
Was just as bad as the first. Schoolnight ‘Subwell’ Dunn threw his toys out of the pram, so it was down to Martin ‘Allergies’
Dibble to have a go between the sticks, only to cause as much effect as Schoolnight we were soon 10 - 1 down, leaving Allergies to adopt a
similar attitude to SchoolNight - giving up the gloves and handing them over to Sykes. He also had little effect, but did manage to get
nut-megged TWICE, but Pussy ‘Sonets – Bubbles is my favourite character’ Baker was undeterred by the beating the
defence were taking and
was up front whipping in shots from all over and then scoring a from a controversial free-kick set up by Allergies. Pussy ‘Sonnets’ Baker was
surely on target for the Dumpsters first hat-trick, the man of the match award was surely in the bag. Spurred on by his night with ‘Girl 1’
and a morning of reciting Sonnets, Pussy found himself one-on-one with the keeper, but adopted an Allergies style nosebleed in front of goal
and the keeper managed yet again to keep the ball out of the net. Final Score 12-2
Sacked Managers Review
"It was always assumed a fitter / sober team would give Sundays more of a boost, but this week with the majority of the team staying in the night before it showed it made very little difference, back to the usual Saturday drinking next week."
To The Pub
Retiring back to the usual drinking establishment to see our mate Jamie for a few ill-tasting Stella’s, the Dick of the Day rule that no
member can earn ‘DotD’ if not in attendance but for this week was reviewed. An exception was made for Spal’s weak towel throwing efforts,
meaning ‘Club Dick’ Pussy ‘Sonnets’ Baker once again avoided the Dick of the Day award and narrowly missed out on retaining his Man of the
Match title. Leaving this season’s dick of the season still up for grabs – it’s anyone’s guess really……
JD |
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