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Dumpsters Part Troix FC |
2-6 |
Wolseley Boys |
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Dan 'The Length' Clifton |
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George 'The Stud' Mead |
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The Dumpsters
were relegated to the championship on Sunday after falling to defeat
against Wolseley Boys, their 5th defeat in 6 matches this season.
Things were never looking good for the Dumpsters with only three of
their regular players available for selection. Martin 'Allergies' Dibble
was busy sunning himself in Crete, John 'Schoolnight' Dunn, Felix
'Pussy' Baker and Alistair 'UTT' Taylor were all at the Anite
company funday, and Richard 'Fraggle' Cragg was otherwise engaged. George
'The Stud' Mead and Jon 'Black' Russell agreed to step in and save the
day, and Dan 'Psycho' Sykes had also promised to make a rare appearance,
but made himself a contender for Dick of the Day by failing to show up,
leaving the Dumpsters with no subs for a match that they simply had to
win.
First Half
The first half started in fairly sedate fashion, Wolseley
boys seeing a lot of the ball, but being well marshalled by the
Dumpsters who weren't looking too disorganised for once. The opposition
were letting fly with shots from all over the shop, and those that were
on target were beaten away with ease by Alex 'Spal' Sutton. However, as
the half wore on it became clear that the Dumpsters had very little to
offer going forward, and the lack of threat was later to cost them
dearly. The pressure began to tell, and after 10 minutes, one of the Wolseley Boy's long shots somehow found it's way past the limp wristed
Spal and into the back of net. That's the way it stayed until just
before half time, when the Dumpsters were taken apart again and finally
punished, leaving the half-time score at 2-0
Second Half
Spal came outfield for the second half, with Tim 'Ferret'
Preston taking his place between the sticks. The Dumpsters showed
slightly more attacking intent but the high temperatures and lack of
subs were beginning to take their toll, and the tracking back became
less and less committed. Things weren't helped by Tim 'Ferret' Preston
throwing the ball straight to a Wolseley striker, leaving him and simple
finish, and winning Ferret the Dick of the Day award in the process.
Other ridiculous goals were then conceded. At one point, Jon 'Black'
Russell was having a drink behind the goal whilst the ball was in play
instead doing his defensive duties, leaving his keeper cruelly exposed
and with little chance. As the Dumpsters pushed further forward in the
hope of getting back into the game they were repeatedly punished at the
back, the score eventually reaching 6-0.
The Dumpsters finally
got on the score sheet in the last few minutes of the game. Dan 'The
Length' Clifton had a rasping shot from distance repelled by the
above-average Wolseley keeper, but managed to slot home the rebound.
George 'The Stud' Mead completed the scoring, coolly slotting into the
corner after a good run. However, the game was long since over at that
point, and the Dumpsters relegation to The Championship was confirmed,
leaving their devastated fans in pieces on the sidelines.
Sacked Managers Review
"I'm holiday, so boots off."
To The Pub
A severe lack of numbers put pay to any pub outing, with the days awards
being decided pitch-side after the game. Spal was awarded Man of the
Match for what was, in the main, an exceptional first half goal keeping
performance, whilst Ferret awarded himself Dick of the Day for his
dreadful second half gaff.
DC
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